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Ryan
If there was one person, living or dead, to whom you could apologize, who would you choose, and what would you say?

I've been apologizing for who I am and who I've wanted to be and all the things I've done since I was a child.

I think it's time people owe me apologies.
 
 
 
Ryan
02 February 2011 @ 01:05 pm
 

 
 
 
Ryan
21 December 2010 @ 01:06 pm
All I want is:

1) my son to be spoiled
2) my wife to be spoiled
3) peace on Earth, goodwill for men
4) peace on Venus, goodwill for the Venusians and an end to the war of the Red Kartholites.
5) A life sized android of Amy Pond that is technically real, but not real so I'm not cheating on my wife.

 

6) these feelings of sadness and loss at the holidays to go away
7) for me to stop posting this and instead go watch the Charlie Brown Christmas with my son...
 
 
 
Ryan
16 November 2010 @ 10:53 pm
My god, I decided to give you a full chapter, right after a very long prologue set in this world's modern day, we get this flashback to introduce one of our heroes.

21703 written, four chapters, still not even halfway.  I'm going to need a miracle.


(REMEMBER: as always this is very rough)


CHAPTER ONE:: GREY AND VANDIVERCollapse )
 
 
 
Ryan
12 November 2010 @ 06:40 pm
Getting in quickly before the maintenence:

His face changed into an old man's determination and resolve and he stood defiantly at the edge of the iron walls and looked through the smoke. There were no ships through the smoke that he could see. Perhaps they were farther off, beyond the screen, with long range catapults. He looked up to the sky and could only see the obscured sun. Have you learned to fly, he asked the Enemy as if they resided in his thoughts, Or tamed some wild beasts to drop you upon us?

"Gentlemen!" he barked. The men nearest him stopped what they were doing, even those tending to the wounded. His voice compelled and they froze, as always.

"Every available rifleman needs to be firing on the debris, no questions. I want the top of this wall to be covered in your shell casings! Every man without a rifle, take the wounded below and once they are safe with physicians, come right back. Right god-damn back! You will be taking the place of the fallen and in charge of preparing ammunition. When your partners fall dead, you will take their rifles and continue their work of firing into the debris. Anyone who runs down those stairs will be shot in the back, by myself if I see you, or your friends and brothers. The only men to die today will either be cowards or heroes."

The faces of the young men and even older soldiers were suddenly very pale and watched with slacked mouths. Bullfench was handed a rifle by one of the few less intimidated, an older private with a hard face.

"They are here," Bullfench said through gritted teeth, the words he dread for so long, "and damn you, I will not let them breach this city while the iron still holds to stone. Go."
 
 
 
Ryan
11 November 2010 @ 09:42 pm
"Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known."

"For small creatures such as we the vastness is bearable only through love."

"Our species needs, and deserves, a citizenry with minds wide awake and a basic understanding of how the world works."

"The universe is not required to be in perfect harmony with human ambition...The universe seems neither benign nor hostile, merely indifferent."

"Who are we? We find that we live on an insignificant planet of a humdrum star lost in a galaxy tucked away in some forgotten corner of a universe in which there are far more galaxies than people."

"In every country, we should be teaching our children the scientific method and the reasons for a Bill of Rights. With it comes a certain decency, humility and community spirit. In the demon-haunted world that we inhabit by virtue of being human, this may be all that stands between us and the enveloping darkness."

"Science is not only compatible with spirituality; it is a profound source of spirituality."

"Finding the occasional straw of truth awash in a great ocean of confusion and bamboozle requires intelligence, vigilance, dedication and courage. But if we don't practice these tough habits of thought, we cannot hope to solve the truly serious problems that face us -- and we risk becoming a nation of suckers, up for grabs by the next charlatan who comes along."

"In a democracy, opinions that upset everyone are sometimes exactly what we need. We should be teaching our children the scientific method and the reasons for a Bill of Rights. With it comes a certain decency, humility and community spirit."

"Virtually every major technological advance in the history of the human species-- back to the invention of stone tools and the domestication of fire-- has been ethically ambiguous."

ReMIX

"A celibate clergy is an especially good idea, because it tends to suppress any hereditary propensity toward fanaticism."
 
 
 
Ryan
09 November 2010 @ 09:16 pm
He wants to take her into his arms one last time. The passion of the night before, when both of them took the little musician in his bed was still riled up inside of him. He spent the night staring at her, not the girl pleasuring him and now he still can't take his eyes off her. The smell still lingers in the air and on both of them, her smell and not each other's. Once they leave the bakery that serves as his apartment, the shared passion is away and they are once again the best of friends until the night comes and they may or may not choose another woman to entertain them.

He touches her cheek and she looks at him.

"I'm hungry," he whispers to her. "For food."

She smiles at him. "We will go to the bread shop down the street and I picture tarts in our future. Not just of the feminine kind, but a nice cranberry tart in my immediate future will get me over this heartache. And for you, the obligatory toast with butter of course."

"I need to be writing," he says with a twinge of guilt as he changes into his blue and black clothing, "If I don't have the Epocrypha written by the end of month I'll lose tenure. Unless you want to sell my body to the Core, of course. But what would you do without my eye for pretty women?". His eyes twinkled with mischief and she smiled again.

//////////////////////




She fell to her knees after this, clenching her stomach as she handed the paper up to Benjamin. Her hands shivered as he took it from her gently. He touched her on her hair and she reached up and took his hand in hers.

"Is it pain?" he asked.

"No, just that knotting feeling," she said with short breaths. As her breaths grew deeper, her eyes lit up with determination and she let go of the uncomfortable feeling and stood back up.

Benjamin attempted to look unconcerned and while looking down at he paper, said, "I told you no more majicks for unsubstantial things."

"It's a message from the king," she said again, "You need to respect the substantiality of it."

"How many times have I told you," he said reading the message, then throwing it back into the empty space where the coals had been. "Fuck the king." She looked at him angrily and he sighed. "I suppose we're not going for toast and tarts this morning then?"

She shook her head, "No toasts or tarts for you tonight either. Good day my love." She kissed him on the forehead and left the apartment.
 
 
 
Ryan
09 November 2010 @ 05:04 pm


I'm posting this just because all right? Jesus Christ, why don't people have the balls to make music like this for films anymore?






Every 6 months I play two movies for Isaac, waiting for him to respond. One is Star Wars Episode IV. The other is Labyrinth.

Someday.

Did I mention my wife fucking hates David Bowie?

And Nine Inch Nails as well.

*sigh*
 
 
 
Ryan
04 November 2010 @ 07:43 pm
Do you want a taste of the NaNo novel?








Dear J.K. Rowling,

Your books are entirely unrealistic. I mean, a ginger kid with two friends?

Sincerely, Anonymous





That's not it, that's just funny.
 
 
 
Ryan
12 October 2010 @ 09:41 pm
I'm still alive, see? I haven't simply abandoned you, Livejournal.

I'm coming to grips with my own immaturity and it's not pleasant. This could be my usual manic depressant period; could be, but why not eliminate that?

I can't even write right now. I will try and keep up to date on this again. I promise.

I have so much to say when I'm feeling articulate.